LOST IN SPACE quotes part one
THE RELUCTANT STOWAWAY
Maureen: Dr. Smith, you shouldn't be here at all
Smith: Precisely the point I've been trying to make without much success I might add.
John: Incredible, not one constellation you can recognize. Where are we?
Will: Am I still in quarantine?
GENERAL AT ALPHA CONTROL: Mr. President status control on Jupiter II. As of this moment, the spacecraft has passed the limits of our galaxy--it's presumed to be hopelessly LOST IN SPACE."
TV MAN: As of this moment, 18 hundred hours October 21st 1997, all efforts to restore communication with Jupiter II and America's first space family have been unsuccessful. The last report from the Jupiter II's automatic systems before all communication ceased indicate that extensive damage may have been caused by premature activation of the spaceship's environmental control robot. It is now believed that the tragic fate of the Jupiter II and its occupants may well be the result of sabotage on the part of an agent from a foreign power.
Judy: I can't sleep. Not until we know something.
Don: Then you're going to be getting pretty sleepy.
John: Well if those are orbits, there's a whole lot of traffic out there.
Will: My parents are on the Jupiter II spaceship and my sisters with Major West--he's our pilot and Dr. Smith, here, well, he just seemed to be aboard when we lifted off.
Don: Maureen, we've had serious control trouble FOR SOME TIME--unless we get outside and make exterior repairs, well, we could be in even worse trouble.
ISLAND IN THE SKY
Smith: Now you will fire all rockets and we shall leave this vale of tears and head back to Earth.
Don: They say any landing you can walk away from is a good one.
THERE WERE GIANTS IN THE EARTH
Maureen: You take your hands off him.
Smith: My dear Madam.
Maureen: Don't you dear Madam me. Turning that thing loose on him.
John: Now we know nothing of whatever life forms may exist on this planet. We only know that we must depend on ourselves for survival. So starting tomorrow we're going to turn this immediate area into a self sufficient community and that means everyone is going to have his job to do and that means everyone, do you understand, Dr. Smith?
John: Living cells neither animal nor vegetable but combining characteristics of each.
Don: Then the soil of this planet contains a parasite requiring another life form in order to reach maturity.
John: That or metamorphosis... a constant changing sequence of life forms starting with some insignificant life cell in the soil and ending who knows where.
Smith: Vegetation wise at least, we are on a very hostile planet.
THE HUNGRY SEA
Smith: There's a lot more human in you than I thought. No planet can have an orbit like this.
John: Smith, this is Robinson. Now why on Earth should we believe you?
Smith: May I remind you my dear sir, that we are no longer on Earth!
John: Oh, that's very clever.
John: We found lots of this frozen solid in the ground.
Maureen: It looks as though it's been charred.
John: It has.
Maureen: Burned and then frozen--why that doesn't make sense, does it?
John: Darling, very little on this planet makes sense...by Earth's standard
John: I don't what got into him.
Maureen: It's bound to happen to all of us. Here on this hostile planet with danger everywhere and fighting for our lives every moment.
Hapgood: ...finding things that you know can't exist but do--happenings that'll put your heart up your mouth and your blood up your toes, living things that breath fire and swim in ice.
John: Well, not knowing how long we can last here or if we can ever get the Jupiter to fly again--they deserve something more than that.
Smith: I didn't know our robot had one of these.
Hapgood: Nothing in space has ever welcomed me and I'm sure it's been the same with you folks.
Hapgood: It's too bad you didn't think about them before finding out that space doesn't take too kindly to family outings.
MY FRIEND, MR NOBODY
Smith: Say it. Say it. Diamond. Diamond. Diamond. Diamonds.
Penny: Mother, do you think just a place could think and talk...well, like here, maybe?
Maureen: Well, maybe.
Penny: I asked daddy if it was only people who could have brains and he said very few of them do.
Maureen: Well, darling, I'm sure that there are all sorts of mysterious forces that we don't understand, even forces with far more intelligence than we have.
Penny: You mean like a rainbow could have feelings or the moon maybe?
Maureen: Why certainly, I think so.
Penny: Mother, I'm scared--if a thing can like you, it can get mad at you, too.
John: It's like a new Milky Way.
Penny: Welp, caterpillars can turn into butterflies, can't they?
Maureen: Oh, John, look, just look."
Nobody says, "Goodbye, Penny. Goodbye Penny."
Penny says, "Goodbye, Mr. Nobody."
Nobody repeats, "Goodbye. Goodbye."
INVADERS OF THE FIFTH DIMENSION
Smith: I tried to save them to make up for the shameful, vile, infamous things I've done.
Will: You weren't so bad, honest.
The Robot: I detect an alien presence.
The Robot: ON THIS PLANET, WE ARE THE ALIENS.
Maureen: says, Touche.
The alien: Love, what is it? Can you eat it? What does it do? except profault (?) the clarity of the brain.
On the screen we and they see Maureen say, "Will!"
The alien: Extraordinary--it seems to be a form of madness common to all of them.
Will: I can't help feeling the way that I do.
Alien: What primitive, barbaric creatures you are. On your own planet yo slaughter each other unceasingly, all in the name of love.
Will: At least we keep trying to get better--we don't go around turning people into machines.
Maureen: What happened?
Will: Welp, there were these guys and they didn't have any bodies or mouths.
Maureen: No bodies?!
Will: No, and they tried to take my brain.
Maureen: Your brain?!
John: Now what would they want with your brain?
Will: I dunno.
Don: In that case, until we know which way this crazy planet's going to jump, I suggest we cut the water rations in half now.
Don: That's probably how you used to sneak gas out of cars when you were a teenager.
Smith: I was never a teenager in your sense of the word, Major. Don: I hope not, cause I'd owe all of em an apology if you were.
Smith: Oh, shut up.
Robot: That does not compute.
Judy: He's out there somewhere--maybe dying.
Maureen: Well, there's nothing we can do about it now, Judy. I wish there were.
Judy: I can't forgive myself for being so unkind to him.
Maureen: Well, I don't like to speak ill of him but he wasn't always very likeable you know.
Judy: Only this morning I let him know how I felt about him, using up our drinking water. I know I hurt his feelings.
Maureen: Well, that's not important now, dear.
Judy: Oh, I wish there was some way of letting him know how sorry I am.
Penny: Dr. Smith and this robot must have had a very good understanding.
Will: I guess so. Dr. Smith was a whiz at getting the Robot to do things for him--he even got him to play my guitar once (THE HUNGRY SEA into WELCOME STRANGER cliffhanger). Oh, I know he got the Robot to do some bad things once in awhile...but they don't seem so bad now as they did then---I wouldn't mind if he came back and tried some thing bad again---just as long as he came back.
Back to Judy and Maureen:
Judy: I never thought I'd be saying this--but you know, mother, I miss him, I really miss him.
Maureen (staring off into the desert): Well, so do I. I keep looking toward the door of his cabin expecting him to come marching out with a long list of grievances--storming at us because we're so incompetent, then stomping off in a huff because we don't pay any attention to him. You know I read somewhere once that people like Dr. Smith are called injustice collectors...most of them are very nice when they're not collecting. (pause) We'll find him.
Penny: You look so beautiful up there, sky. But you'd look even more beautiful if you were all dark with clouds and rain was falling and filling the lakes and rivers and the streams....not until we find Dr. Smith though.