LOST IN SPACE-The Deadly Games of Gamma Six, the Thief of Outer Space
THE DEADLY GAMES OF GAMMA SIX
DIR-NATHAN JURAN--which explains the wonderful action sequences
NARRATION: Last week, as you recall, we left Will, Dr. Smith, and the Robot busily repairing the weather station, unaware that a fierce band of giant alien warriors were even now landing on their forgotten planet."
TEASER-fully recapped with extra opening shot of Will getting out of the Chariot--up close to the glass car...
Will takes another tool kit out of the Chariot and hops down. NOTE: There is a large antenna device on the Chariot's back roof--some kind of light above the set also or something coming from the Chariot (?). Will starts to move up a high incline which is overlooking the back of the Chariot. Will goes up to Dr. Smith and the Robot. He hands cutters to Smith at the weather station on the plateau. Smith cuts the wire and throws the tool. Robot warns he did not fix the wires of the sensitizer. Smith tells him it is perfect and they pick up the tools. Will says, "Oh, hi dad." "Hello son," John comes up, "Welp, how's it going, Smith?" Smith is ready to relay it to the Jupiter II and pushes it, having the honor of doing this by John. It blows up a bit--Smith leans on the Robot (this shot was used by Ted Turner's TBS station in the mid to late 1980s as a still to promote the show). Robot warns, "Attention! Attention! Alien approaching!" A very large man, a veritable giant Smith says, walks to the area from another way. He is wearing a two piece outfit with his stomach bare, sleeveless top tunic and folds his arms. John looks, "He doesn't seem hostile. Let's find out what he's doing here." Smith wonders, "We've had experience with these strange space creatures before you know." NOTE: Since Barney Slater had a hand in the teleplay of THE SKY IS FALLING, THE CHALLENGE, and FOLLOW THE LEADER where similarly dressed aliens appear, he also wrote THE DEADLY GAMES OF GAMMA SIX, perhaps Smith is referring to the Taurons, the Ruler, Quano, Kanto, or all of the above! Will says he probably doesn't understand us. John moves to offer his hand--that's the universal gesture of peace and friendship. Smith says, "Oh, it's an excellent idea." The giant man pulls John down and they fight low to the ground. The fight escalates upward. Smith gasps and pulls Will to the front of him. John ends up throwing the man down the hill. Will yells, "Dad lookout!" Another giant man, similarly dressed, comes running to him and picks John up bodily over his head, ready to toss him! Robot warms his electric but Will warns him not to--he might hit dad, "No, you might hit dad!" Robot says, "Affirmative!" Another man, smaller, calls to the giant in a strange language. The larger puts John down. The man, Myko, tells them Gromak meant no harm. John says, "Sure, anyone can see he was just having a little fun. I'm John Robinson from the planet Earth." Myko saw the fight and could have stopped it anytime but didn't. Smith tells Myko, who wanted to see who would win, "Professor Robinson flattened that gentleman like the proverbial pancake." Myko defends Gromak as having fun. Gromak says, "Fun!" Myko says, "It is said throughout the galaxy that Earth men are weak and without courage." John responds, "That just goes to show you, you can't believe everything you hear." When Will asks if Mr. Myko is from this planet, he tells them, he will only be here a short time--it is not his planet. Smith tells him that their stay will be more permanent. John tells Myko, "Our spaceship was damaged in an accident." Smith asks Myko is he is going to Earth or near it. Myko asks John's weight--190 Earth pounds. Myko yells, "Behind you Professor!" When John turns, Myko punches John's jaw. Gromak stops John from retaliating against Myko. NOTE: When Myko did this, the next scene we see had his neck ornament and brace (also worn by the Ruler in THE CHALLENGE) is crooked; the shot of Myko after that--it is straightened out. John tells Myko to explain. Myko is a fight promoter, here to hold a series of bouts as he does every year--the Gamma games. Held on this planet and witnessed by hundreds of millions. Myko tells John he has chosen him to become one of his fighters, "You may become champion of the entire galaxy!"
The first alien comes back up the hill. John tells Myko he must be joking, "I'm no fighter. Thanks for the compliment but no thanks." Myko begins his con of Dr. Smith and Smith is taken in. Smith says, "I have never been fond of sports--they're so healthy." Will and John leave (BRIGHT IDEA--LEAVE SMITH ALONE WITH THE ALIENS AGAIN SO HE CAN MESS UP EVERYTHING!!). Smith called after them, telling Will to take care of his father. They leave in the Chariot--Smith sending the roly poly rowdy Robot with them. Of John, Smith tells Myko, "He and I enjoy a very close relationship--he always follows my advice on important matters." Myko tells Smith to consider the riches he will get half of if he is John's promoter as well as passage back to Earth. Myko pulls a knife on the hurt fighter who, due to the injury, cannot fight now. Smith stops him, telling him he wouldn't be so callous and brutal; that the man will heal in time. Myko tells Smith the two fighters are not very intelligent. Smith tells him, "Mister Myko, you're basically a very kind person." Camp--Will gives a blow by blow description of the fight. Penny and Judy are near the ramp on the rocks. John and Maureen are at a table. Maureen is washing blood off John. Don says John covered himself in glory but Maureen says, "He covered himself in blood too--his own. Really, Don, I'm surprised at you." John defends Don, "Don's not condoning the fight, darling. It's just when its forced on you like that--you can't run away." Judy says, "Well, when your opponent is bigger and stronger than you are...it's only sensible to back away." Will says, "I think that's kind of cowardly." Judy makes a face at him. John says, "Well, look, why don't we just drop the subject." He is mad already but then Smith's arrival doesn't help. He stirs things up some more. Don says, "Look who's talking--Smith, the man of action." Smith calls his innuendos inane.
Smith says, "When an opportunity is offered I seldom fail to seize upon it." Don looks around and points, "Yeah and usually at our expense, too!"
John finishes, "Look, I know where this conversation's going--Smith, I'm not going to fight in Myko's games and that is final." Maureen says, "Good and I second the motion." John tells Will that he can give a good show of himself but primarily he is a scientist. Don tells Smith that John wouldn't have a chance against professional athletes. Smith says, "Personally I think he would win and so would Will." Smith goes on, telling John he is afraid. John yells at Smith to go on and fight in Myko's games himself. John leaves. Smith continues. Maureen gets up and confronts him, "Dr. Smith, you try my patients!!!" She walks off. Smith plots, "If at first you don't succeed, try, try again."
Myko comes out of his tent at night and goes to tubes. A leader with a gray-white beard in Oriental type robe appears. He is also wearing a large black hat. He tells Myko he and his people have long wondered about Earth humans, having heard many tales--its people strange and unpredictable. Getting an Earth man involved is necessary to the future plans of the military leaders of their world. Myko tells him that there are other Earth men here. "One of them must be in the games," the leader says before vanishing. NOTE: we hear a slower version of the into commercial music that is first heard in ISLAND IN THE SKY where John first goes out of the hatch and at the porthole, floats past Judy and Maureen.
Day--John is handling a device with Will. Smith arrives and offers to help. John suspects an ulterior motive--his offer to help is like a cat offering to be friends with a canary. Smith "helps" but steers the conversation to athletics. Will tells Smith dad was a three letter man in college and had an offer to play professional football. John says, "That was a long time ago." He asks Smith to help with the block and tackle chains on the device. Smith brings up Myko's offer. John won't even discuss it. Smith says, "You are sacrificing the future of this entire party for your own selfish reasons." John says, "You know there's a limit to my patience and you're rapidly reaching it." Smith goes on, telling him Will can look at his father with pride instead of shame--Smith says he cannot be silent. John is about to demonstrate some of the athletic prowess on Smith as Smith says, "Accept Mister Myko's offer--save our intrepid little band from this life of hardship." John says, "Alright time's up!" Smith runs, "You're making a mistake!" He runs away.
John looks at Will and asks what is on his mind. Will avoids telling but then says he thinks Dr. Smith's right! John finishes Will's story, "And we'll all go home and live happily ever after?" John realizes Will is disappointed in him, "You're disappointed in me, son, aren't you? Of course, you are--every son wants to feel his father is the greatest, that he can succeed in everything." Will believes John can. John tells him, "Some things I do well and others not so well--my battles are fought in a lab, you understand." Will really doesn't but just stares, "I guess so." John says, "Let's get back to work." Will just stares and John stares at him. This is one OF THE MOST IMPORTANT scenes in ANY LOST IN SPACE: a main hero admitting he has faults. This is a rare thing in television then and now! It also makes John very human and rises LOST IN SPACE above just a kid's show, a science fiction show, or its silly reputation. There are more scenes of this nature to be found in the rest of this episode, despite the silly sequences later with Geo and Smith's training.
Night--from behind a rock, Smith and Will watch Myko's men training. Will says, "Cheer up Dr. Smith--we'll get back to Earth some day, somehow." They see Gromak crush a rock. Will says, "Gromak's not dangerous--Mr. Myko said so." Smith adds, "But does Gromak know that?" Myko gives orders, "Grendam shalaa" and Gromak lifts 40 times his weight! Myko says, "Shala Brandone." With a glove, Gromak smashes a very big rock. Will says, "Gol--lee!" Myko shows Will and Smith the Wheel of Life contraption which is from the planet Lotharn or Lothar. There are six weapons, five of which contain harmless puffs of smoke; the sixth contains a deadly laser beam. Myko demonstrates it and it drills a hole into a rock. Will calls it Russian Roulette. Smith gasps, "Diabolical machine," and shudders. Will wishes dad could see it. Smith says, "He prefers more intellectual pursuits." Myko gives Will a training device--a dart gun which has a rope attached to the dart--you must get within three feet of the target to have it have an effect--if not, the dart falls harmlessly to the ground. Will notes it gives the animal time to get awfully close. Will thanks Myko. Smith tells Will to go look around the camp; then Smith tells Myko the truth: he couldn't get Prof. Robinson to fight. As they talk, Smith sees a midget fighter, Geo, fighting and get knocked out. Myko wants Smith to be a fighter and cons him, telling him he can chose any opponent. Smith is about to refuse when he sees Geo knocked out. He chooses to fight Geo, then he and Will leave. Myko tells Geo he gave a convincing performance. Geo continues to spar with alien fighter, vanishes to an invisible state, and appears somewhere else--knocking the giant out. Geo goes to sit on Myko's lap, "At least it will be a humane victory--Dr. Smith will never know what hit him." Geo and Myko laugh.
Day--Smith practices on a punching bag outside the ship. Will brings him water; Penny a towel. Don and John ask Smith what is going on. Smith says, "I shall fight in the games of Gamma 6." Smith works out with the Robot as his coach. Will shows John the dart gun and demonstrates on the punching bag. John calls it a primitive way of proving your courage. Will says, "You wouldn't understand, sir, you're too intelligent. It's not natural for you to rely on brawn instead of brains."
John tells him, "Son, a man with a high IQ will fight as quickly as anyone else provided the situation demands it. I want to get off this planet just as badly as he (Dr. Smith) does. And another thing, sometimes it takes more courage to refuse a fight than to accept one."
John asks him to come and have breakfast but Will wants to go help Smith get into shape. John looks at the punching bag after Will goes and at the dart. Smith is in sweats and baseball cap. He calls the Robot a mechanical monolith as Robot gives him a massage on a table. Penny is wearing pigtails. Smith calls the Robot an ineff ineptitude or something. Penny has to give Smith his iron tablets and runs up the ramp past Myko. Smith calls the Robot a clumsy clod and Myko rolls his eyes. Penny yells GANGWAY! as she flies past John and Don as well as Maureen and Judy who are folding a towel (?) on the ramp. Judy and Maureen go inside. John and Don ask Myko about the games. Don comments, "I'm afraid Dr. Smith would only add humorous interest." Don asks about the purpose of the games. Myko gets upset, "The games are a series of sports events held of spectators and entertainment." John asks, "And nothing else?" Myko leaves and looks back. Don says, "He sure got hot under the collar for nothing. I wonder why." He says, "Mr. Myko was nice enough to pay us a visit--maybe we should return the courtesy." John agrees, "Tonight." They go into the spaceship.
Night--Myko summons his leader, seemingly praying with his hands (?) as Don and John just arrive. The pair hide behind a rock. The leader says the military leaders of their planet will be watching. "If the Earthling does well, we will reward him handsomely. If he loses, his planet will suffer the consequences--we will invade his world and subdue it." John tells Don, "C'mon." The next morning, the two try to explain to Dr. Smith about this. Maureen is sewing a blue robe onto him that says TIGER SMITH. Don tells him if he loses he'd be placing the Earth in great jeopardy, "You know Smith, must because you're being matched against some little alien--doesn't mean you're gonna win--I mean this could be some kind of a trick or something." Smith will heed the Major's "dire doubts" and Don gives up and leaves. NOTE: This is interesting as in the first season it is Smith who almost always warned the Robinsons about how awful the aliens were--when most of the time-the aliens weren't---now it is reversed. Smith talks about his returning home a galactic hero with their spaceship repaired. While John applauds his desire to help them, he won't permit this. Smith says, "You have no authority over me." John orders the Robot to see Dr. Smith stays here, "I don't care how you do it." Robot says, "There is only one way to handle a Tiger." Smith is in a red cage soon enough--a large red cage (are we to believe this was from the Jupiter II's gear?).
Smith complains, then cons Robot, "What were you before we met--a hulking mass of mechanical ignorance, a nothing, a nobody, who programmed you, who spoon fed you the facts of life and made you what you are today--the sleek sophisticated charming companion that are today." He goes on to ask Robot who is it that oils him, keeps him running smoothly, and working properly. Robot admits, "You do." Smith cries he has been the Robot's confidant, protector, and friend. Robot comes over to the cage and Smith and he shake--declaring they are friends. It is all a trick: Smith pulls the power pack off the Robot, says, "You traitorous tin plated fugitive from a junkyard!", gets the keys off the Robot's wire frame on his body, and gets out. "Adieu. Ninny!" Will find the Robot and activates him, finding the power pack in the open cage. He tells the Robot it is not important that he failed, "We can't let him face all those aliens alone." Smith has changed and is ready to fight. He puts a glove on to smash a rock, "Gromak indeed!" He tries to smash it but hurts his hand. The first event on solarized cameras will be Smith vs. Geo. The two enter the ring and the games are started!
Myko announces Geo of Centaur (or Zentuar) vs. Professor Zachary Smith (yes, Myko calls Dr. Smith---Professor Smith). We hear music which is probably stock and which will be heard again in A VISIT TO HADES. Will and Robot arrive; Will pleads with Smith to stop--it is too dangerous to Earth and to Smith. Robot says of Geo, "Warning! Appearances can be deceiving!" Smith calls him a jabbering Judas and gets caught in his robe as the gong sounds (we hear goofy western fight music from WELCOME STRANGER) as Geo tries to hit Smith from behind while the goofy doctor tries to get free. Smith, accidentally, back hands Geo with his glove and knocks him down. They fight some more and Geo vanishes, appears behind Smith, and kicks him. We hear a variation of the BLAST OFF INTO SPACE music as Geo appears again and knocks Smith down. Robot throws the flag in; Geo wins. Will tells Myko, "You tricked him. It wasn't a fair fight."
Will helps Smith out; John arrives, telling Smith, "Thanks to you, there may not be an Earth to get back to." Will tells him, "You were right, dad, Mister Myko wasn't to be trusted." John says, "There's no satisfaction in proving a point if as result, the Earth's going to be invaded." John tells Will he's learned from experience and that's the best way. John challenges Myko who seems to ignore him until John says that although the aliens believe Earth people can be beaten easily---they are wrong--and he wants to show them that. John goes into the ring, "You can't judge the actions of Earth people by Dr. Smith." He wants to fight now, telling Myko, who continues to refuse, he is afraid. Myko caves in and lets him fight Geo but tells John, "Nothing will be changed." John snaps, "Yeah, we'll see about that." Will tells John, "Careful dad, he can disappear." John takes off his belt and whips Geo into an area, grabs him from behind, and lifts him up until Geo gives up. The Earth will still be invaded. John says, "Then how about Gromak for size!" He attacks the giant man and is knocked flat on his back. John runs at Gromak but Myko ends it with a knife to John's chest, stopping him. He says, "Gromak drona armum." Myko tells John to accept that the Earth people are going to suffer the consequences of his refusal to fight earlier. Myko goes out of the ring. John puts his belt back on and sees the Wheel of Life, "It's our only chance of saving Earth," he tells an anxious Will. Will says, "Dad, you can't." John says, "Son, whatever happens, know that this had to be done." Myko is goaded into going against John in the Wheel of Life, both sitting at chairs as the wheel spins. It goes down to two. NOTE: Myko is quite smug as the harmless puffs of white smoke pass over his face and it is quite funny--I recall a friend imitating this expression and it was quite funny. They get down to the last two. It is Myko's turn--the next is John's--if Myko shoots a dud, the laser is next. NOTE: as John goads Myko to push it, repeating this several times for him to push it, I once thought Myko was afraid to kill but I now realize Myko was fearful that the next one would kill him. He could care less about killing John. Myko gets up and ends the game.
John gets up and pushes the button--the deadly laser beam, "You'd have been a winner, Myko. It would seem Earth men have more courage than you gave them credit for. We're a peaceful people by nature and just because we don't like to fight, doesn't mean we won't!" Myko stares without looking John in the eyes, telling him that his military leaders realize what he said is true and cancel the invasion. John says, "That's what I came to hear." Myko hangs his head. He goes back to his tent.
John starts to chew out Smith who congratulates him, "If all the dumb, stupid things you've ever done...this is the grand tour de force..." Smith turns around with a black eye which makes John laugh. John puts his arm around Smith, "C'mon tiger, maybe Maureen can find a beef stake for that eye." Smith snaps at the Robot, "Coach indeed! It's all your fault!" They leave.
CLIFFHANGER: Night--the Jupiter II door opens and there is no electronic sound, just the grinding of the door pushing open. A meteor storm has just ended. Will wants to look for meteorites, "All sorts of exciting things may have dropped." Penny finds an alien bottle but Smith tells her that anything of value that fell into the atmosphere burns up. NOTE: stock music from earlier episodes--the rest of the next episode, THIEF OF OUTER SPACE has a new and totally wonderful score. John tells them, "Tomorrow we're checking for damage...and that means all of us," he points at Smith. Morning--Smith says, "Life was much more exciting in the past." He tells William that his father invents one useless job after another---but the mineral drill looks okay to Will. Will puts the tools down, some near an outcrop of rock which lay on other rocks, creating a tiny area of space between. Smith sleeps against another rock. A hand with rings on it takes the tools from in between the rocks. NOTE: We see a blue plant. The tool bag is gone, Will finds out. Will asks Smith about it, then looks around. A hand pulls on the lunch basket which Smith has his arm around. Will yells and wakes up Smith, who screams. An Arabian Thief in colorful Arabian robes and turban, confronts them, "Dogs! Infidels! Prepare to die!" He waves his sword right at them!
TO BE CONTINUED NEXT WEEK, SAME TIME, SAME CHANNEL
REVIEW: This episode, despite lots of silliness from Smith via the boxing routine and the silly Geo character, maintains some standard. WELL, IT DOES. The Will-John-father-son scenes are well done and some of the best of the entire series. The action with John fighting the wrestlers and later with the Wheel of Life was tense, despite the macho-ness of it all. Also it is nice to have different points of view from the Robinsons for once. This rarely happened--it was usually Smith on one side, the Robinsons on the other. Judy didn't agree with Will; Don didn't agree with him either or with Maureen for that matter. John noted when a fight is forced on you, you have to defend yourself, defending Don against Maureen. Will agrees with Dr. Smith's plan this time. This kind of interplay and different outlook on things usually appeared more often in LAND OF THE GIANTS. Both shows are finer for this. Myko makes an interesting menace, sly, and sneaky and not unwilling to kill, it would seem. Savage. The alien leader added some mystery to the proceedings. Yes, some of this is silly but salvageable. Unfortunately the silliness builds with the next episode...
THE THIEF OF OUTER SPACE
MUSIC-ROBERT DRASNIN-a new and totally wonderful score--the best thing about this farce.
NARRATION: Last week, as you recall, we left our space family having just survived a terrifying galactic meteor storm. All were unaware that an incredible thief of outer space was soon to follow in its wake.
TEASER-mostly recapped, some lines missing--Will's line missing:
Night--the Jupiter II door opens and there is no electronic sound, just the grinding of the door pushing open. A meteor storm has just ended. Penny finds an alien bottle (stock music from earlier episodes) but Smith tells her that anything of value that fell into the atmosphere burns up. John tells them, "Tomorrow we're checking for damage...and that means all of us," he points at Smith. Morning--Smith says, "Life was much more exciting in the past." He tells William that his father invents one useless job after another---but the mineral drill looks okay to Will. Will puts the tools down, some near an outcrop of rock which lay on other rocks, creating a tiny area of space between. Smith sleeps against another rock. A hand with rings on it takes the tools from in between the rocks. NOTE: We see a blue plant. The tool bag is gone, Will finds out. Will asks Smith about it, then looks around. A hand pulls on the lunch basket which Smith has his arm around. Will yells and wakes up Smith, who screams. An Arabian Thief in colorful Arabian robes and turban, confronts them, "Dogs! Infidels! Prepare to die!" He waves his sword right at them! Smith pulls Will to infront of him. The Arabian Aliens (?) puts his sword right at Will's chest but Smith picks up a shovel and fights (?) the sword. The alien is about to kill Smith (maybe?) when Will stops him, "This is a laser gun and it can drill a hole right through you," he strains to tell the alien this. Somehow he got to a gun. The alien is Sheik Ali Ben Dab, the thief of outer space. He wears a large ear ring (ahead of his time, is he?). Will says, "Don't come any closer," but the thief, charming, makes Will drop the gun (?). He wants to show them his diamonds, emeralds and rubies. He throws a ruby and a giant slave appears in a blast of smoke and sparks. The giant slave, muscular in a colorful vest with no shirt on beneath and also Arabian clothes, says, "Yes master." The Thief says, "Seize them--seize the dogs!" The slave grabs Will and Smith!
The Slave holds Will and Smith back to back, holding their wrists which are tied; Will looks back at him. The Slave, at the Thief's instructions, breaks a wrench in half. Will says, "Golly." The Thief thinks he's met Smith somewhere before. Smith has lost his watch and has nothing more for the Thief to steal. Will disgraces the Thief by shaming him into thinking he's robbing poor people--paupers, "And any thief that would go robbing from paupers, stealing from the poor...!" The Thief yells and raises his sword but merely cuts their bonds. He chastises the Slave that the arrow pointed to this planet. Thief asks about a treasure on this planet and Smith, scared, tells him about a spaceship. Will tells Thief, conning him, that, "...we're like castaways." Smith says, "I prefer the word pioneers." Later, after the Thief leaves with Slave, Will is at camp telling Penny about the Thief, "Big ear rings and all." Smith is on a couch outside the ship while Judy and Maureen apply wet rags to his forehead and give him medicine. He calls Robot a babbling bumpkin. John returns and we only hear the parajets as he lands. He is wearing his first season outfit with a jacket over it. He takes the parajets off his back. He did some old fashioned Indian tracking and found footprints--Smith's and Will's. John claims it was much too hot out there for them to have been doing any work. Penny teases Will--about the old Thief getting away on a magic carpet. Later, Penny apologizes to Will, chasing him down. She's helped him look for "his" Thief for hours; now she asks him to help her fix her new swing (?). Will imitates her, "All you ever care about is playing games when right now the this very minute the terror of the cosmos may be lurking." Penny laughs, "Listen to you, William Robinson, you read too much, that's all," and even more sickeningly (in Penny's worst scene ever and Angela Cartwright's worst acted), "...No, I won't wait. I'm sick of your old fairy tales." She runs off. Will, determined to prove it, goes off past two rocks. He follows a series of three blasts of colored smoke to find a strange Sedan Chair on a platform with spiral rings on top of it. Another blast occurs, then a much larger one, but he goes to the Sedan Chair and onto the glowing podium. The music during this entire "find the Sedan Chair" sequence is excellent. Will tries the door but it won't open. He looks in and is about to go when the door opens by itself. We then hear an Arabian type version of previously used "scary" music (and not unlike the DAY THE EARTH STOOD STILL scare music). Will goes in and the door closes. NOTE: Clearly, he can just jump out the open window! He doesn't and the Sedan Chair blasts off, Will falling into the seat cushion. He hangs on as he sees outer space at the window.
The music here is wonderful and is used again, notably in FLIGHT INTO THE FUTURE. Will sees an asteroid at the window and the Sedan Chair approaches it--it gets closer and closer to him. A blast and Will has landed. The door opens and he emerges, appearing to be underground. There are torches. The Sedan Chair blasts off. Behind Will, embedded in the rock, is a silver gray old fashioned door (used in the chamber bell in VOYAGE TO THE BOTTOM OF THE SEA-THE CONDEMNED). Will backs up against rocks as the Slave passes to go to the Thief, who calls Slave to heat up the furnace. As they sail through space, they must keep it up. Thief felt a draft and tells Slave if an intruder has come aboard using the Sedan Chair--to throw him to the lions. Slave gets Will in a very good scary scene as Will has no where to hide. Slave covers his mouth, picks the small boy up under his arm and takes him into a large workroom. Slave puts Will to work on many of the devices. Will asks, "Did I do alright--you won't kill me now will ya?" The Slave smiles, "Maybe yes--maybe no. I tell you later." Will, ever polite, says, "Thank you very much, sir." Slave tells Will of his stature. Will says, of his being Slave, "That's too bad," in a sincere tone. More excellent music as Will works the devices; Slave laughs it up on the floor, kicking his feet, "Now you...are the slave of a slave!" Night--John taps Maureen on the shoulder and presents her with daisy flowers on the other side to surprise her. She asks, "Where on Earth did you find them?" John smiles, "Well, not on Earth." He thinks they need water so Maureen puts them in the alien bottle. About giving her a gift, John jokes about "never using an ulterior motive" on Maureen but adds he is starved. Suddenly the moon light of the planet's moon is blocked out as we see the asteroid cross the moon and the sky of their planet. Judy and Don come; Judy thinks it is an eclipse (she seems obsessed with eclipses in a few episodes); John points out it is an asteroid and orders Don to put a track on it, which he does naturally. Maureen asks, "Dr. Smith, would you find Will and Penny for me?" When Smith complains, John tells him, "If you want to eat tonight, be a nursemaid." ALL RIGHT, JOHN--IT'S ABOUT TIME! Robot will accompany Smith who calls him a garrulous gargoyle. Thief wakes up Slave in the workroom and knows Will was here and tells Slave, "Yes, where is he?" Thief scares Slave with his ring, mentioning the Slave's former master---a crafty villain. He tells Slave, "I have plans for the boy." Will is soundly asleep on his back, his head on a pillow and a blanket on top of him. There is treasure all around him. Thief finds him and pulls the blanket up alittle further but Will wakes up, jumping. The room was dark when he came in but when he sees the treasure now he says, "Wow!" He and the Thief move to another room through some curtains. Thief tells Will he is poor even though he has a few diamonds and emeralds from each planet he passes. The Treasure belonged to a princess who was taken by an evil Vizier. The golden arrow guides him to find her. As the asteroid comes into a fourth orbit, Thief looks at his circular viewscreen as the arrow points, "Boy, is that your planet?" He grabs Will around the neck and questions him. Will panics, "No, I mean yes, I mean let me go!" Thief does but uses his sword at Will, who yells, "NO!" Thief merely dubs him assistant Thief. First rule of a Thief--eat while thinking, think while eating. They eat chicken or some kind of meat on a bones. Second rule of a Thief--"I'll ask the questions, not you," Thief tells Will. Thief looks at the circular screen and we see a very RARE overhead shot of the Jupiter II door, table outside, and ramp--with John coming out of the ship, Judy sitting at a chair at the table, and Maureen! Thief questions Will about them. He now tells the Thief, having told him earlier on the planet that Smith was his only friend, that the Robinsons are not really, exactly, his friends. Thief thinks they are enemies, "After we've found what we're looking for--we'll kill all of them! Third rule of a Thief--DEATH TO ALL ROBINSONS." There is another draft and someone used the Sedan Chair. Penny, whom the Slave carries in and drops her. Penny calls, "Will!" Will jumps up onto the cushions, "Silence, cur, dog!" Thief warns him, "Don't overdo it, boy." Then he notices Penny looks like the others on the screen and asks if she is a Robinson. NOTE: Why doesn't he realize Will is one of them, too---or does he? Will says, "Yeah, I think it might be one." Will acts snide and evil. He picks up the Thief's sword and encouraged by Thief raises it at a gasping Penny's head, "Death to all Robinsons!"
Smith blasts onto the asteroid in the Sedan Chair which then leaves and brings the Robot, whom Smith called a meandering mechanized ninny. Smith is happy and calls the Robot loyal and other nice names. Robot says, "I did not come after you, Dr. Smith." Smith says, "How dare you!?" Robot tells him, "You refuse to socialize with me." Smith orders him, "Come out of there at once and destroy on sight, any alien you find here!" Robot cannot, "In order to fit in here...I was forced to remove my lower tread section." Smith calls him, "You bubble headed booby!" Robot came merely to warn him, "There are extreme dangers up here. I hope you survive them and rescue Will and Penny." The chair blasts away. Smith backs right into the Slave and runs, yelling. Penny does the slave work in the workroom for Will...and the furnace. Penny stops, "Will Robinson, when I get you back home I'm gonna...Oh, Will." Will says, "Well take it easy." Penny is a hostage until the Thief gets what he wants--Will tells her it is better than having her head chopped off. Will tells Penny the princess, daughter of a Caliph, left a paper trail when the Vizier kidnapped her 200 years ago--the treasures are the paper trail. The Vizier took her to a place called Utopia. Penny tells him, "Oh Will, you're making it all up. I mean, no you're not---I'm sorry, Will." It looks like she is going to cry. Will says, "Penny, don't do that." Penny asks of Will's plan, "Will it help Dr. Smith, too?" She was sure Smith and the Robot would come after her since they were with her when she opened the door of the Sedan Chair. They hear noise as the Thief finds Dr. Smith who is in a robe and feather turban. Thief calls Slave, who recognizes Smith somehow. He tells the Slave that the lions will have Smith as dinner now. Slave goes to prepare them and Thief prepares their dinner. On the planet, Judy returns with a flashlight and John asks her to get one of him too as she goes into the spaceship. Don runs out--he notes the asteroid gets closer on every orbit. Smith is under a swinging pendulum which is supposed to get closer on every swing but it doesn't look like it is. Smith tries to get Thief to let him go, "The boy loves me, he loves me." Thief says, "But I don't." He, too, seems to know Smith's face. In an old book, Thief shows Smith a white haired princess and asks if she is on the planet. Will and Penny come and see Smith. Will pushes the "female" down, telling Thief she has a secret. Thief Rule 32: beware of females with secrets. Penny tells Thief she wouldn't tell but, "he threatened me with such cruel torture." Thief says, "Oh really, boy." Will shrugs. Penny recalls her father's map to a planet called the Oasis of Utopia, "...or is it Utipia?" Thief takes Will (who tries to get him to take Smith along, too) and Penny. They leave Smith to bemoan his fate, "Oh, to be cut down in the prime of life. What an ignominious way to leave this vale of tears, oh dear."
Sedan Chair blasts off and Slave saves Smith from the blade. Thief, on the planet, tells Will the blade isn't even sharp. Slave shows Smith a book--a painting of the evil Vizier--for 200 years the Thief wouldn't look at this face--and wouldn't permit Slave to look, either. The face of the Vizier bares a striking resemblance to Dr. Smith, the "most evil of all evil." On the planet, Will feels the trick Thief plans is like the Trojan Horse. The Thief seems to know of this Trojan Horse. As he bids Penny a, "Farewell, female," Will and Penny go behind the rocks to go to camp. Penny says, "Female. Just wait, soon we'll trap him..." Will goes back to the Thief who tells him Rule 21--Never Trust a Best Friend (speaking of Dr. Smith). Smith is just a hostage--the Slave can't accidentally feed Smith to the lions because there haven't been lions on the asteroid in years--it is much too cold for them--Thief uses a recording to scare intruders. He tells Will it is foolish to trust Will, "What's the good of living if you can't trust a little boy." Penny and Will hightail it back to the Jupiter II and try to act it out with Don, John, and Maureen but they can't understand what the kids are talking about. Penny tells mom that she knows this boy is their enemy but to do as he says and he will not harm them. "Oh daddy," Penny says, "Let's go inside the spaceship." John says, "Penny, maybe you'd better explain." Penny says, "It's true about the thief but Will's got a plan." Will tells Don to go behind a rock; Penny gets a fake map from the table. Will throws the ring and the thief appears, "Dogs! Infidels!" John picks up a pipe and fights the thief in a well done action sequence, accompanied by more excellent and new music. Don grabs the thief from behind the rock and Will warns them not to let the thief touch his rings. Thief yells at Will, "Traitor!" Will tells him he is not just that he has to bring Dr. Smith back from the asteroid. Thief yells that the map Will gets from Penny is worthless and calls Will a, "Conniving little beggar!" Dr. Smith and the Slave arrive, Smith wearing robes and a feather turban, "Do as I say or my slave will destroy you all." Slave says, "Stand still everyone!" Smith says, "Professor Robinson, as you can see, I've saved the children." Smith tells Slave he will set him free provided he disposes of "this thief and his asteroid forever." Smith says to John, "Turn him loose, Professor, this is none of our affair." Will yells, "No." Smith waves, "You stay out of this, William." Thief tells Will to throw his rings and he does. The Slave vanishes in a blast. Thief gets loose and gets his sword and attacks Smith, threatening to slice him into the past or in half or something. Will stops this as the arrow points to the alien bottle. The thief touches his sword to the bottle and a fat princess appears. The Thief tells her, "You've changed." She has eaten marzipan for all these years, just sitting and sitting. She starts to say something but he tells her, "Later, when we are alone." The Thief blows her up and tells Will he merely sent her back to his asteroid, then tells Will to come with him, "Together we will loot the universe!" Will turns him down and Thief says of Smith, "For it is written, he is nothing but a Smith. Farewell, infidels. Farewell boy." He vanishes and turns into a flaming ball of red going back to his asteroid. Smith is in his underwear. John tells the others, "I think we'd better leave." Maureen laughs, "Yes." Laughing, the others leave. From her bottle, the princess tells Smith to let her out and she will fall in love with him. Smith says, "You'll do nothing of the kind," hitting it slightly and leaving. The Robot sees the bottle and tells her, "I am not programmed for romantic entanglements." She asks him if he has any extra marzipan. THIS EPISODE SUCKS.
CLIFFHANGER: Night--in a close up-medium shot, Penny and Will walk down a trail. Robot is behind them. With the binoculars, Will wants Penny to just take notes and let him do the bird watching, "I'm the man around here and men give the orders." Penny mocks Will's attempt to shave this morning--all he managed to do was cut was a huge hunk of skin--and now he has his chin bandaged a bit. Will claims he was just practicing--he didn't know there was a blade in the razor. Will tells her every time he takes her along, "It's nag, nag, nag." They argue about their use of the language, starting with Penny's phase "habit pattern." Will makes fun of Penny's wording, making a feminine pose, "The neck is angular with a gentle pink band running around its face, the legs are slender, graceful with a delicate...sounds more like you're describing a fashion show than a bird." They argue more but Robot stops it, telling them they both have a good grasp of the English language but a specimen will get away if they continue arguing. ORIGINAL MUSIC starts here, quite different for LOST IN SPACE. We hear the bird and see some stock footage of it on a small tree--a real tree, not part of the set. They've already categorized this one: it's a plumpbellied Dr. Smith sapsucker. Penny wonders why the others have Smith's name in them as well: a Dr. Smith Whinedottie and a Dr. Smith goldfinch. Will doesn't ask Dr. Smith to come with him anymore---Robot says, "Otherwise every bird on this planet would have Dr. Smith as part of its name." A spaceship passes overhead. Penny looks up, "C'mon Will, we'd better get back to the Jupiter II." Will notes that someone is throwing something out of the spaceship--luggage, trunks, and suitcases. Robot warns, "Warning! Approaching danger!" A large trunk, the parachute not opening, crashes to the ground. Penny screams and runs, apparently dropping her note pad. She runs to a safer spot, "Will lookout!" A crate comes right toward Will. THIS EXCITING SCENE IS MARRED BY POOR EXECUTION--AS WE CAN SEE THE ROBOT WAITING TO PUSH WILL OUT OF THE WAY AT THE LAST SECOND. Really poor and this motion actually gives on the impression that The Robot is pushing Will under the falling crate!!!
TO BE CONTINUED NEXT WEEK SAME TIME SAME CHANNEL
REVIEW: This episode really marks the gravespot of LOST IN SPACE. While episodes such as SPACE CIRCUS, THE ANDROID MACHINE, and others (as notes) have been silly and a bit unrealistic, THIEF OF OUTER SPACE takes the cake. It makes no sense, loses its charm about half way through, and has the worst wrap up of almost any LOST IN SPACE. This episode can probably be considered the worst. Malachi Throne and Ted Cassidy make the most of their roles, relishing every minute and obviously having fun---but neither of those facts make a good episode, certainly not here. Even the fantasy element is wasted--a good set (the asteroid), a good pair of villains in wonderful costumes, and an Arabian flavor. With a bit more care this could have been fun, if nothing else. As it is, it makes little sense--why would the Thief spot Penny as a Robinson and not Will--or did he? Smith's lines are the most absurd in all of the series--in the last act, he appears as the Vizier and contradicts himself several times--saying, "Stand still everyone or my Slave will destroy you all," then proudly announces to the Professor he has saved the children; he tells the Slave to kill the Thief and plays the Vizier, then tells Robinson, "This is none of our affair." The Thief puts the Princess back in her bottle but says he sent her back--lying to Will, I suppose. He goes on surface value too, I suppose, not wanting her back since she is fat. Are we to believe she stays in that bottle for the rest of LOST IN SPACE? Smith gets left in his underwear, then casually talks with the Princess; Robot contradicts the later DEADLIEST OF THE SPECIES by telling her he is not programmed for romantic entanglements. I am sure this episode might have looked good on paper--an Arabian adventure, a wild ride to the asteroid (and IT WAS nice that even a few of the characters got off that dismally dull planet for a bit), a fight between the Thief and John (while Don waits around for a few minutes doing nothing to help), Smith having a lookalike (again) and acting like the Vizier, a chase through space for the Princess, and Will entranced by the Thief. Trouble is the execution was awful. The lines were awful. The Thief spouts inane and stupidly coy lines, referring to his Rules of a Thief. Penny over reacts to anything and acts like a baby with her new swing. Will over reacts as well, "Terror of the cosmos," INDEED! Skip this episode if you can! I wish I could say things would improve a lot but I cannot tell a lie.